First I guess I should apologise for throwing you out of our bathroom window - that was probably uncalled for, especially as you made the worst splatting noise I have ever heard as you landed (ew).

However, I am sure you understand that I was not very happy to see you (or 2 more of your long, slimy friends) in my living room last night making trails on my rug! I did think about pouring salt on you (I had some prepared) but cleaning up bubbling, dead slugs at 1am is not my idea of fun...

I have no idea how you get into the house, we checked everywhere and put salt around each wall but you still manage to get in, taunting me with your trails that don't lead anywhere and after throwing out a total of 6 of you I am willing to say that I am not happy, especially as I have developed an irrational fear of stepping on one of you after finding the first one with my bare feet *shudder*

I feel its only fair that I warn your (hopefully last) remaining slug friend who hid from me and then danced circles on our welcome rug last night after our little showdown that if I see him - I will salt him!

Or at the very least Boyfriend will... as he is almost always wearing some sort of foot wear!

p.s. We did actually buy this book for our friend who hates slugs... I'm seriously considering borrowing it!