I've taken another couple of weeks away from my blog again because our sweet (stubborn, awesome and loving) little Harry died a couple of weeks ago. He's been ill for a while but his death was still sudden and I think its going to take me a while to truly process because its just so hard to think hes gone, especially when I'm here in Leeds and he would have been at home in Norfolk.
This was the last photo of him I took on film (my phone is full of digital photos!) and I think it might be a perfect shot of him - he was always happy when out and about with us all and this photo shows that. I've been dreading to share it because it will truly be the last photo I ever take of him and share here - and that thought... is just an awful one.
Although Harry wasn't my dog, we were pack/family and he always was so excited to see me and spend time with me. He taught me how truly loyal dogs can be by spending one particularly difficult day at my feet and never once letting me be on my own - I have no idea how he understood or knew that I needed that - but he did and the love I felt from him that day, quite frankly blew me away and never left me in any doubt that he knew I loved him too.
I'm so sad that he'll never pester me for biscuits again after pretending to wee in the garden or that he'll never hog our sofa and yet still demand more space. So sad that his little paw won't rest on my leg or that he'll never sit super close when he knows I'm having a tougher day (like I said, he always knew) or that he wont catch me up on all the gossip when I haven't seen him in a while (every time he would yip at me for ages, so funny) He was so loved by so many and his little face just made me so happy.
After a difficult year, grief is still overwhelming me, with my Grandad's death still breaking my heart and Harry's loss adding further to the feelings of heartache and pain - but this is definitely one of those times where it was better to have loved and lost than to have never have loved at all ❤